I came across an item which caught my eye: “Einstein’s ‘God letter’ from 1954 goes on auction block” (USA Breaking News, December 2, 2018) that could yield $1.5 million. In it Einstein writes, “The word God is for me nothing but the expression of and product of human weaknesses, the Bible a collection of venerable but still rather primitive legends.” I was surprised by the large dollar amount, but then further amazed by a follow-up article in the New York Post (December 5, 2018): “Einstein letter declaring God a ‘weakness’ sells for $2.9 million.”
It had been a while since I pondered the existence of God and remembered Pascal’s Wager. Blaise Pascal, a 17th century French philosopher, argued “that a rational person should live as though God exists and seek to believe in God. If God does not actually exist, such person will have only a finite loss (some pleasures, luxury, etc.), whereas he stands to receive infinite gains (as represented by eternity in Heaven) and avoid infinite losses (eternity in Hell).” (Wikipedia)
When my son was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, I paraphrased Pascal’s Wager into a way of living—if you don’t think you’re going to die and either you don’t die or do die, you have lived fully. If you think you’re going to die and do, there is no issue. On the other hand, if you live like you’re going to die soon and you don’t, you would have wasted useless preparations for something that did not happen.
An article entitled “Wrestling with Religion and Spirituality” in Psychology Today (December 2018) written by Dr. Saul Levine, professor emeritus at the University of California, San Diego, takes up the issue of God’s existence in a rational and comprehensive way which illuminated my own thinking. He writes:
“Although I wasn’t a firm ‘Believer’ in God, I couldn’t call myself an Atheist, which somehow seemed too ‘defiant’ and definite. Nor could I comfortably say I was purely Secular, which felt simplistic. The description of myself as Agnostic seemed equivocating, perhaps dissembling. But I have since learned a few salutary things:
…We humans need to Believe: We tend to feel better, more grounded and safer, our lives are more meaningful when we have an intense Belief System, like God, or a system of overriding values or ethics.
…One can be spiritual and not religious. There is a spiritual dimension to human existence, which we can occasionally sense or ‘connect with.’ There are metaphysical forces which we do not, perhaps cannot, perhaps shall not, completely understand.”
These thoughts reverberated in me, making me reexamine my thoughts on God and my own belief system. One of my favorite quotes is by James Lipton, host of the TV series “Actors Studio,” who said when asked what he would want God to say as he entered the pearly gates: “She would say, ‘Surprise, I exist.’” That pretty much sums up where I stand today…anything is possible: one God, many gods, a higher power, re-incarnation. After all, energy never dies, so it must go somewhere—into others not born yet or in that strange feeling of the presence of departed loved ones. I still talk to my late husband, Herman, and am convinced of his presence, in fact I feel him actually poking me when I fall asleep at meetings, which he always did. I have always felt the presence of a little angel sitting on my left shoulder protecting me. I am forever mystified by unexplainable occurrences, which many people have experienced.
We are all vibrating molecules, made of the same primordial elements that formed the galaxies, we are stardust sharing our DNA with every living thing on earth.
This makes me feel a part of everyone and everything; it tells me that I belong to this planet, my home. I think of it as similar to living in bee hives and ant hills—all living together, needing each other, helping each other survive and thrive.
I wake up every morning grateful to have woken up to a new day full of anticipated and unanticipated adventures. It could start with waffles for breakfast, my daughter sending me a new photo of my great-grandson, lunch with friends, a phone call, the sound of laughter…all wonders. I try to be attuned to the world’s vibrations, listening for the atmospheric messages of love, of kindness, and of compassion, in a helping hand, a smile…we just need to look and then reciprocate. Miracles are everywhere.